A Cute Thing About Your Partner

I think it is cute to have a partner who remembers everything about your relationship like how you both know each other, when is your first met, what color of your scarf that day, when was the first time he/she confessed, when did you guys get married, how did you look on that day.

And it is much cuter when he/she remembers every single detail about you. Like what is your dream car, your favorite color, your phobias, your childhood stories, your comfort outfit even though you only tell them about it once and they seems not to pay attention but they actually did and they remember it.

I'm not gonna be that cute partner I guess. Sometimes I forgot my boyfriend's age. Bhahahaha.

I might forget those things. I'm gonna even forget our anniversary. Pity you baby to have a forgetful wife like me.



[I'm being cringy lately. Sorry]

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My Dream Wedding

Hi peeps. It is good to see you again. It's been awhile I didn't write here omg I feel bad. Been lacking of idea but don't worry here I am gain to share my 20 cents (sorta)

So last weekend I went to a wedding ceremony on behalf of my parents since they were not in town on that day. I don't get this opportunity often since my parents always wanted me to stay at home babysitting my little brothers while they go out socializing lol so this content may be common to you but kinda bizarre to me lol ( sorry my lol usage goes outta control )

What can I tell you about the ceremony is, it was so simple. As if there's no ceremony at all. There was only two canopies which were set up on the house yard, tak halang laluan jalan. There's no pelamin. They just set up a swing which was hung at a tree and decorate it with some fake flowers. There's no karaoke, no songs played out loud, no photographer, no professional make up artist etc.

Our family's open house is far merrier that the wedding ceremony. Well I guess maybe it was because it is majlis sambut menantu, and the son is not the first child so no need meriah sangat.

And the invitation card, they just photocopied it on A4 papers and cut them into three. And there's no envelope. More like a flyer.

Well it's actually my dream wedding. I want my wedding ceremony to be exactly like that. There just a few things which need to be done, not time consuming, money saving, and most important thing is it don't cause headache.

Don't need pelamin because I don't want to bersanding. No need karaoke, DJ or something. I don't want them to play songs out loud. Those things are only gonna mess up my head. No need a lot of canopies, no need to cause traffic jam. I don't want people who pass by curse me on my wedding day. And the invitation card, I think there would be no invitation card. I'll share my house location via whatsapp lol just kidding. But I'll make it as simple as it can be. Yelaa nanti orang buang jugakk, so it is so wasteful to have a fancy invitation card.

But yeah photographer is a must. Cause I want everything that happened on that day to be photographed.

I would like to have the solemnization and reception on the same day. So prepare baju kawin sepasang je, takyah tukar tukar, Pakai je that baju from majlis nikah sampai habis majlis makan makan tu. And I really want to wear kebaya on my wedding day. I don't go for fancy dress, gown kembang. I'll look like a moving mushroom. And my husband would wear baju melayu, sampin, keris and tanjak instead of suit and tie (even though guy who wears suit and tie catches my eyes)

We'll have a traditional wedding ceremony on that day. A ceremony yang macam orang dulu dulu buat. Sebelum semua orang start menunjuk nunjuk nak buat majlis meriah, sewa dewan bagai. Lol.

And I would like to pay everything on my own. Taknak sedara sponsor, taknak parents sponsor, taknak mintak duit husband (I don't even want hantaran) [takpe biy you boleh simpan duit tu buat beli barang dapur lepas kawin. Bini you ni suka makan hiks]

Tapi tu majlis belah Nadh la. Majlis belah husband buat style dream wedding dia.

Actually, belum kemaruk nak kawin pun. I still have many goals which need to be achieved before I get married. Tapi if one day da sampai masa nak berlaki, Nadh nak buat majlis simple cenggitu. Hoping that I'll get the chance to get married, to be a bride, to have my dream wedding come true,and most important thing is to get married with the love of my life. hiks.

Love,,


(ps: sorry there's no picture that this entry is like a boring article)

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CSR Volunteering at Zoo Melaka

So I did something that is very interesting today. The most interesting thing than anything else.

I joined the CSR Volunteering event at the Zoo Melaka and it is way more fun than I ever imagine. We cleaned up the animals cage, got rid their poos, cleared up the dry leaves and everything. People would say "ewww so gross, cleaning animal's poo" and whatsoever. But yeah I find it interesting. I won't mind to do it everyday. Yep I'm changing my ambition for 3984838474th times. I wanna be a zookeeper now.

Okay enough with that.

We got the chance to feed animal, and it's way too amazing. And I was chosen to be a volunteer during the birds show. I had to open my arms wide then the zookeeper put some birds' food on my palm. Then there's two bird came to eat those foods on my palm. They were kakak tua. Damn the feather is so fluffy that I felt like patting it. I wanted to bring them home too. Then there's flamingo dancing omg just like a professional dancer. They danced beautifully and gracefully.

What amazed me very much is there's a bird, (IDK what's the species all I know is it is a bird with colorful feathers) which can answer some simple math question and can spell. I think that bird goes to school 😂😂😂  All the CSR participant got the chances to take pictures with all the show birds for free. That's cool for sure.

I learned a few things about birds today. The zookeeper there said that taking care a bird is like taking care a girlfriend. It is so emotional and sensitive and full of envy. Once you pat a bird, you gotta pat all the birds. Otherwise the rest of them will get jealous and mad. Awwww so cute meh. And the birds' poos indicate whether the birds are in shape or not (you might don't wanna know bhaahhaahha)

Then there's come to my favorite part. After the CSR is over we were allowed to stroll around the zoo. I've been longing for that moment as I always wanted to go to the zoo. Yup I'm old school.

Well there's nothing bizarre actually at the Zoo Melaka. Just the common animal. But yeah I was super excited to see those animals. I love animals. (except cat, they're rather scary). I found that there's seven species of deer there and there's 55 of them altogether. What a huge amount (because we can't simply find one at the roadside)

Besides the kakak tua, I got the chances to feed elephant too. Except this time I had to pay five ringgit. It worth it for an experience though. The baby elephant is way too cute that I feel like petting it 😬😬😬 I always want to pet elephant, tiger and an owl. They all are so damn cute. And I saw all of them today. God I had so much fun (otherwise I won't write about it in my blog) . 

So here's some of the picture that I took at the zoo. 

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It doesn't fit

I've been living a sad life this past few weeks. It feels like the whole world is against me. Or is it me against them? idk. I suddenly stop talking to everyone. It is sick to death y'know. It is sick to not talking to everyone, to keep everything by your own. It does. And it is killing me. I feeling skipping this part and move to another part of my life where it could be much happier.

Society sucks. Or precisely, my social life is suck. I always don't get well with people. I tried to fit in, tried to mingle around but yeah you know, when people keep showing and making it obvious that they don't like you, you gotta walk away somehow. So that is what I did. I walked away from my housemates. I push them away. I stop talking to them, I stop cooking for them (they never like it anyway). I locked myself in my room all day long. And it is sucks. Cause I always love them. Even sometimes they been bitter to me. 

I NEED A FRIEND

Well sometimes I get envy with those people who got friend for life. Someone that they can stick up to. Someone that hear your make stupid jokes and laugh at it. Someone that you can share about how was you day going.

But yeah, reminiscing my past when I always end up pushing people away, I think that I better shouldn't have ones. It's bad to have temporary friends. I'm done with those "people come and go" things. They keep leaving empty space in my life. There's hole everywhere. 

My biggest problem is I don't always fit in. Imma weirdo. And kinda sensitive too. I take people jokes way to seriously. I even cry when they call me names. And I always end up walking away from people.

In whole life, based on what I observed, I can't be too close with a friend. I'll ended up stop talking to them, walking away from them, and eventually we become strangers. I'll give you a name. It's Umi Aisyah. I wonder where's she now, what's she doing, how was her life. It's been a while since we both talk. She was the one who avoiding me first. Then I guess she didn't wanna be friend with me anymore. So I walked away. And there's another one. Syamimi Zakaria. We used to be best buddy during our first semester here. Now we ended like a stranger. It is all because she got a new friend.

Then my roommate, Firuz Farhana. Idk what happened actually but suddenly we stop talking. And she's still my roommate. I haven't talk to her like for months already. I always hate her being so judgmental and paranoid. She judges me by my tweets. And I guess she still do. But then I had Syafika Najihah and Kua Ning Way which we ended up the same too. Ika was mad at me cause I accidentally picked her wet laundry, and since that day she started slamming the door, stamping her feet etc which makes my sensitive heart cried actually. I felt guilty for making her mad that I stop talking to her. Ning Way, Idk how it happens actually.

And yeah I almost forgot about my friends in matrik. Well the stories are the same. First we'd been so close, then  we stop talking then we become stranger.

Well, I don't blame them. It is all my fault, I don't fit in, like I said. My social life is suffer since I was small.

Nevertheless, I'm grateful to have that one guy that still be friend with me for years now. It's Hafizan Hakimin. But he's not here. And I often feel lonely. And I miss him sometimes. He's the only friend that I can tell almost everything, that I can be myself with, that get my stupid jokes. And I hope we don't end up like me with the others too. It is way too scary to imagine...

And also, I have Adibah who always be there for me whenever I'm down. She senses it through my tweets and always asks me whether I'm okay or not. Talking to her is so relieving. It's like having a sister.

Well people said, "count your blessings, not your problem". I'm grateful to have those people that I don't get along well so that I can appreciate the people that stick together with me. I'm glad that out of those problem, I'm still able to look at the bright side.

And hey look, I still got flowers blossom around my head

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1308 30122016

I've started to think that this life is a bed a roses. Apparently I was wrong. The happiness that I got lasted in a few seconds. I was on the cloud nine that I forgot that there's gravity keep pulling me to the ground. I faced the free fall then I hit the ground hard, I can't even get up again.

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